I think you've got to be retarded, or maybe something way worse, if you don't like a quote of wit and worth.  You know how you hear or read something and you think 'how excellent is that!'.  This is only the beginning of loads I've jotted down after I discovered I never remember them, just like jokes.  No recall whatsoever. I shall be adding to these, so far these are just a few thoughts.  Be absolutely free to add any that come to mind. Or a witty comment.

Many of these I pick up from goodreads, a great book site.  I've already got so many people in my mind, so I've looked the names for some of these initial quotes.

Dorothy Parker  “Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone."
                Dorothy Parker

Marilyn Monroe “I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”
Marilyn Monroe
  • Q. What do you wear to bed?
    A.  Channel Number Five?
    Marilyn Monroe
Winston Churchill “Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off 
              as if nothing ever happened.” Winston Churchill
  • “Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.” Winston Churchill
  • “Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
           "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
            Exchange between Lady Astor and Winston Churchill 

 Oscar Wilde“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
              Oscar Wilde